Monday was kind of crappy, I’m not going to lie.
One of those days when you climb into bed so frustrated and down.
Besides sending Mr. off for yet another week in Seattle, we had a rough start, which turned into a badly behaved rotten afternoon, which culminated in finding out my mom (who always has been so careful about over exposure where the sun is concerned) has skin cancer.
Apparently, it’s the not so scary kind (read: not melanoma), and apparently easily treatable, but still. Cancer.
My family spent 5 years going through chemo with my brother when he had Leukemia, and things like that, they leave a mark on you, whether you realize it or not.
After I had Hannah and I realized that another human being might be depending on me staying alive, I was sure that every headache was a tumor, every bruise meant Leukemia, and every nursing blockage was breast cancer.
In other words, I was a nutty hypochondriac for about 6 months.
I can’t tell you what physically happened to me when my sister said the word “cancer” over the phone, but it involved a spinning head and a cold sweat, followed by (admittedly) tears.
When I went to bed I started thinking about how fleeting life is. And how I never want to waste another day like that again. Ever. No matter the circumstances.
And do you know what, today was different. It was wonderful.
Nothing special or spectacular happened. The littles spent the afternoon in their bathing suits playing with the hose (benefit of an Arizona spring break) while I worked on a reclaimed wood wall piece I’m building. I had a lovely conversation with my mom, filled with reassurances that she’s going to be fine, and lots of (good-natured) family gossip. ;-) I cleaned my bathroom, which is a gross job, but when it’s done and the sinks are sparkling, man I feel good. And me and the littles had a late dinner courtesy of the Wendy’s drive-thru. Ava cooed at me, cried a little and spent a good portion of the day on my breast while I started re-reading Guernsey for oh, the millionth time.
That book makes me happy almost immediately.
I was thinking about what made today so much better than yesterday. Small things really. A good scripture study session, doing Pilates with Hannah this morning, getting outside in the sunlight and fresh air, a text from Mr. suggesting that when I pray I thank Heavenly Father for my blessings instead of asking for anything for myself. And you know what, all those simple silly things really do make a difference.
The secret of life is, there is no secret.
“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. The fact is that most putts don’t drop, most beef is tough, most children grow up to be just people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration, and most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is just like an old time rail journey . . . delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.” – Jenkins Lloyd Jones via Gordon B Hinckley
Lovely quote and great perspective! I’ll be thinking about your family because despite the treatability it is worrisome! As ‘they’ say, tomorrow is another day! :)
Chelsea
Haute Child in the City
That is a really crappy Monday I am sorry! I will keep your family in my prayers, no matter what job of cancer it is always so scary! Love the outfit today though!
http://www.nightchayde.blogspot.com
this is gorgeous and i am sorry about your monday. thinking of you!
kw, ladies in navy
i just thought that you should know that the beautiful blue chevron ring on your finger totally makes your whole outfit perfectly. you win :) here’s the the crappy mondays of life and the small silly things that makes tuesdays better!
That is awful, sorry about the bag Monday (Mondays are bad anyway, sorry for the ESPECIALLY bad one). I really do love your beautiful outfit!
creamyclothes.blogspot.com
My Mom suggested I read that book this summer and it’s definitely become one of my favorites. You can’t help but be entertained when reading it!
adorable cardigan! xo
http://allthingsprettyandlittle.blogspot.com/
I’m sorry about your mom but i’m glad that it’s not serious. On a happier note it sounds like you salvaged the day. Kids always make things better. When I’m down and I see my son smile, it melts my heart and makes everything better, even if just for a moment. I love your outfit today by the way. Hope everything turns out well for your mom Cori.
Agi:)
vodkainfusedlemonade.com
Cori I love reading your blog. I really do. I mean, you always have great photos and great style, of course. And you are a talented designer, that is for sure. But your writing always, ALWAYS makes me smile. I have three kiddos too (hopefully a fourth soon-ish) and I love reading about your time with your kids. They really do make everything all better. I also have an amazing husband who sounds much like Mr. that I am very thankful for. Thank you so much for always sharing so much of your life with us. It is really uplifting. And I do hope the best for your mom. I’m glad to know it’s not “serious” (though that seems stupid to even say about any cancer) and I do hope that she recovers well and quickly. Sending good thoughts to you and your family.
I love this post and this outfit. That sweater is amazing.
I love your outfit here. I’m sorry about your mom and everything else. I just watched one of my closest, most cherished relatives die of old age and it was not pretty. I’ve seen this before, but now that I’m over 30 it somehow hits a little harder. It’s like we have this, and then comes that not all that much later. It all goes by so fast.
{Hugs} Hope your week gets brighter Cori. Your outfit is soft and serene.
Your cardi goes so perfectly with your pants. Love this look!
http://www.shannonheartsblog.com
Well, I`m relieved to hear that today was better than yesterday. A bit of sun & fresh air can really do wonders (especially along with those other little things!)
Some Snapshots Blog
Jess
I’m so sorry about your bad Monday… I’m super sorry to hear about your mom. Big hugs from me!!! Tomorrow is the anniversary of when my mom found out she had breast cancer, and I’ve thought a lot about that today. It turned out fine, but it’s not an easy journey, as you know. I’m glad to hear it’s easily treatable for her though. I’ll be thinking of you and your mom. Love ya! I’m glad you had a better day. :)
Thanks Mo. I’m so glad your mom is better, but you’re right, the process is yucky. Miss you all so much. Hope C is going easier on you… ;-)
I know it is really shocks you to hear that your dear ones have cancer. My grandmother found out she had breast cancer maybe a week ago, and had surgery yesterday. Thanks be to God the lump was removed and she is cancer free. I can’t tell you how happy we all were!! Just know that “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7. These words really encouraged me, I hope they are for you too. :)
Much love,
Alyssa
Gorgeous as always! It is always nice to know you aren’t the only one who experiences rotten days. Guernsey always puts me in a good mood too! Love that book! :)
Thoughts are with you for a happy day and much health for you and your dear ones.
I’m so sorry to hear about your mom having to deal with skin cancer. I was diagnosed with Melanoma almost 2 years ago and was lucky that I caught it early before it spread to lymph nodes. The doctors were freaking out because I was 19 when diagnosed but everything turns out ok with the amazing technology we have today! Everything will turn out ok :)
I hope you have an awesome week!
Oh my gosh, at 19! You are a trooper. I’m so glad you are well again!
Oh Cori, I’m so sorry. My mom was diagnosed with basal cell carcinoma a few years ago, and I know how scary it is. And it was only a year after my brother’s unexpected passing, so we were all especially emotional and scared. She’s doing great now (we all are) and I totally know how A’s smile changes the worst of days. Praying for your mom, and know that better days are ahead!
Jillian,
You are the best. That’s the exact same kind of cancer she was diagnosed with, thanks for the reassurance. And you are right, sweet happy babies make everything better.
Oh – LOVE the outfit ;)
I just wanted to send you something hopeful: We just celebrated our third year in a row of Mom being cancer free yesterday. She had a melanoma on her face. It’s a tricky cancer and we know we aren’t out of the woods totally, but worrying over the future just ruins the good times to be had in the present. A friend of ours was almost killed yesterday and he didn’t have cancer, he was hit in a car chase. It just reminds me that you should each and every day remind yourself to appreciate what you have for it can all be gone tomorrow. Don’t live for tomorrow. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will take care of itself. Appreciate what you have today and today you have loads of blessings. Sending prayers for your mom.
Yay for your mom Jude! We have a party every year for my brother on his diagnosis anniversary (it was actually just a couple days ago 3/13) We always say, if you survive cancer, you deserve a party. I loved what you said about living for today! So perfect!
Thanks,
Cori
I’m so sorry Cori that you have to go through this..My mother died of cancer and everyday I feel cheated because I was a bratty teenager when she died and now that I have a family of my own and would love to sit and chat about how I can now relate to all the sacrifices she made for me..I cant. I worry sometimes that, that will be my fate too and my kids will be left not knowing me other than the “nagger” that makes them brush their teeth and clean their rooms..I also don’t have any brothers or sisters so in a way, I feel like that part of my life was only a memory..it’s hard and I will pray for you and your family.
Rosalyn
http://www.just2fancy.com
I’m sorry to hear about your mom’s diagnosis, Cori! I love the quote at the end and the perspective you’ve come to. Another quote that I often think about is, “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.” May you keep learning to dance in the rain!
My dad and I have both been diagnosed with Melanoma (he also was diagnosed with Basal Cell Carcinoma) and have both ended up with very positive diagnosis’ to date! Since you’ve been through a cancer diagnosis before, you know the fear that can come with it, but you’ve also seen the other side! Keep your head up! Looking for good for you and your family!
A quote I’ve come across recently “On the other side of fear is freedom” ~ Anonymous