three things I learned from my brother.

This post is part of a social shopper marketing insight campaign with Pollinate Media Group® and Godspeed Pictures, but all my opinions are my own. #pmedia #wherehopegrowsmovie http://my-disclosur.es/OBsstV

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My brother and Ava (March 2015)

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Every once in awhile, I see a moment of insight wash over one of my children.  These are those beaming-with-pride-mother moments where I look up to the sky and thank God for sending me these sweet little ones.  It usually has something to do with compassion.  They’ll do something kind for one another, they’ll see that I need a hug, they’ll notice someone who has special needs, and they’ll become kinder, more thoughtful and compassionate.

When I was a kid, these moments were an almost daily occurrence.  Growing up with my brother Matt meant that I understood compassion long before I consciously knew what compassion was.  And even as a child I felt that this was a gif that my brother gave me, and that it was and always has been an honor to be his sister.

Where do you start, writing about someone who has so profoundly influence every corner of your being?  Who has pierced your heart since before you can remember, taught you what it really means to be kind, to love unconditionally, to find joy in life.  I could fill a book with the simple and profound lessons I’ve learned from my brother Matt, but today I’ll just share three.

1. Always look on the bright side.  My brother Matt is one of the most naturally cheerful people I’ve ever met.  I’ve seen his bright outlook work miracles in his life, and in the lives around him.  He has a great sense of humor, he loves writing jokes, he finds joy in small simple things, he doesn’t let hard things get him down.  When my parents got divorced last year, everyone kept asking us over and over how Matt was doing with it.  Ironically, I think he handled it better than anyone else in our family.  He’s just cheerful, no matter what life throws him.  While going through cancer treatments, (yes the universe isn’t fair- five years of leukemia) losing his hair, swelling up, getting sicker than I’ve ever seen anyone, he never lost that sunny disposition.  One of my favorite stories of my brother happened during this time.  I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a spinal tap, but let me just say, the needle they would stick up his back was big enough to make grown men cry.  On one particular day a newer nurse was trying to put the needle in and it just wasn’t happening.  The procedure drug on, the tension and distress in the room growing thicker each minute.  Here was my brother, his hairless yellow swollen body, sores on his mouth from the chemo, laying on the hospital bed being poked over and over again.  Some of the nurses were in tears.  Then out of the blue, he turns his little head, looks up and with that familiar twinkle in his eye says, “Oh my poor broken body.”  The room erupted in laughter, the nurses relaxed, and they finished the procedure.

There’s always a way to look on the bright side.  I learned that from my brother.

I’m still learning it.

2. Don’t be ashamed of your faith.  I know it’s become somewhat trendy to share doubts about faith all over the social media sphere, and often it’s easy to feel like you’re a fool if you have faith, that you’re just drinking the kool-aid, that you haven’t really thought about it enough.  I look at my brother, and I know that isn’t true.  Great faith can and does exist.  My brother has always been this example of faith to me.  He loves the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  He knows it’s teachings.  He lives them.  He honors his membership in our church.  He values his role as a disciple of Christ.  He’s brave in his testimony.  Unflinching.  He spends his time serving God and his fellow man.  He is patient, kind and long-suffering.  There’s no truer follower of Christ, and he’s the greatest example of faith to me.  In the moments of my life where I’ve felt despair, where I’ve felt lost, the light of his testimony has been a beacon on a hill for me.  And the spirit he carries with him always makes me feel closer to God and His Son.

backyard movie party 2

 3. Anything can be a special occasion.  My brother loves to have a party; he needs little to no encouragement, Groundhog Day is reason enough.  He has a party every year on his “diagnosis anniversary.”  His birthday is practically a national holiday, and he’s always counting down to the next big event.  Every Friday night we have a pizza party and we watch a movie as a family.  It’s a tradition my brother Matt started when we were just kids.  Pizza and a movie, every Friday.  Friday night is sacred.  When it’s cold out, we lay a blanket on the floor of our upstairs loft and watch a movie with the kids while we eat pizza and drink root beer; there’s always popcorn.  I always think of my brother, and feel glad that he taught me to make little moments special.  When the weather turns warmer, we take the party outside and watch a movie on the lawn.  (A projector is pretty high on my wish list right now…)  Last Friday we got a sneak peek at the brand new movie “Where Hope Grows,” and it was such a treat.  I’d be lying if I said it didn’t touch all of us.  We all laughed and cried through the whole thing.  And there was something extra special about watching a movie starring someone with Downs while carrying on a tradition my brother started all those years ago.  Plus there were so many moments that reminded me of Matty it was like I was watching him.  Uncanny.  The movie opens this Friday (May 15th) in theaters, and I really encourage you all to go and see it.  There’s a lot of yucky stuff out there, and this movie was just sweet and good.  It’s not going to win any academy awards, but when I finished it, I felt happy the way I feel after I’ve spent time with my brother, and any filmmaker that’s creating that kind of art, I’m more than happy to support.  Plus the kid who plays “Produce” is so dang cute, I can’t get over it.

I could go on and on about all the things my sweet brother has taught me, all the beautiful lessons, but I’ll stop at three.  I will end by publicly acknowledging my gratitude for the opportunity to be my brother’s sister.  It’s been one of the greatest blessings of my life.

backyard movie party

A few of my favorites scenes from “Where Hope Grows:”

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6 Comments

  1. sasa wrote:

    So cute<3

    Shall We Sasa

    Posted 5.13.15 Reply
  2. Tiffany wrote:

    Well Im convinced, I love movies and I love a good cry.

    Posted 5.13.15 Reply
  3. Rebekah wrote:

    Check local collages for used projectors! We bought one used from BYUI and got it really cheap! The bulbs can be the most expensive part so just make sure to get one with a lot of hours left on it!

    Posted 5.13.15 Reply
  4. Tamathabanks wrote:

    My sweet sister in law just had a baby 2 weeks ago with Downs. She was so worried about how all of us aunts and uncles and the cousins would treat him or feel about him but he is absolute perfection. You can’t help but feel close to God when you hold him and you know he is just the most special spirit. I love all these lessons and I will share this post with her. Thank you for it!

    Posted 5.13.15 Reply
  5. This completely warmed my soul today – thank you for sharing!! What a dear sister you are, and a sweet brother he is. Thanks for the glimpse into your relationship!

    Posted 5.13.15 Reply
  6. maci wrote:

    one of my very favorite posts of yours! love to you and that angel brother of yours!

    Posted 5.15.15 Reply